Asking for help

I'm not good at asking for help.  Never have been, and probably never will be.  I also, along with most, I presume, don't enjoy talking about money.  So, put the two together and I'm very uncomfortable.

Philip and I have managed, over the past 16 years, to meet our financial obligations.  With a few hiccups in our early married years, we've been able to make ends meet fairly well.  He earns a very good income that has allowed me to stay home with our kids for the last 13 years, and we've been able to live comfortably.  While we certainly aren't living on "easy street," we've been able to pay our bills, fund the countless fees for our kids' many sports and activities, and enjoy a vacation every year.  We've also been the beneficiaries of my wonderfully generous parents who have helped out when needed, taken us on many fantastic vacations, and frequently gift the kids with the things they "need."  We also consider ourselves extremely blessed to have good health insurance coverage.  Our insurance company has paid every single claim we've submitted since my diagnosis, no questions asked.  But of course, they don't cover 100% of these costs.  We've been able, up until now, to pay our portion (or set up payment plans that we will eventually pay off).  It's been a juggling act, trying to make ends meet through this 14-month journey.  But we've been able to do it while keeping the roof over our heads.  It goes without saying that we've been able to see, first hand, just how devastating cancer can be to a family's financial security.

With the recent news that Philip's firm is transitioning to a new insurance company in a few weeks, we've been spending countless hours trying to assess the effects on my coverage.  While the actual benefits are quite similar to our former plan, the costs will be higher.  And, most important for us right now, they will not cover transplant-related housing.  I so wish that housing wasn't required.  I'd much prefer to be able to stay at home and recover with my family.  But, because of our distance to the UW Medical Center, it is an absolute requirement that I live in the city, no exceptions (believe me, I've tried!).  Our former insurance company granted us a generous housing allowance that would cover most of our lodging costs.  But that has now changed, and we are looking at having to fund over $10,000 for housing for the next 100 days.  With our moving day just days away, this has caused significant stress.

Friends have offered, from time to time, to set up a Go Fund Me account since my diagnosis.  We've politely declined because we felt that this was our responsibility, and that with our insurance coverage, we'd be able to sufficiently cover our medical costs.  However, we now have to set our pride aside, and ask for help.  It's not easy.  Sleep has been lost over this.  But I have to remind myself that the most important task at hand for us right now, beyond all else, is for me to exhaust any and every opportunity to extend my time here on this earth.  This transplant, while certainly not a guarantee of a successful remission, is my best chance at a few more years before we need to look towards the next treatment plan.  There are so many incredible therapies that are emerging on the myeloma front (many being studied and tested right here in Seattle)--I'm very optimistic that we'll have more and better options for treatment down the road.  The trick is to stay alive long enough so that I can potentially benefit from them.  That's my mission.  I don't want to leave my kids motherless while they're in elementary school.  Or middle school.  Or even high school.  The goal is to beat the statistics and odds; to take advantage of every treatment and myeloma therapy that I can possibly get my hands on.  I will do just about anything for more time.  Including asking for help.

We are so very grateful for our friends that set this fund up, and for each and every one of you who feel compelled to help us in this fight (click on link below to view the fund site).  The generosity of others is staggering.  I never thought I'd have to be on the receiving end of a fund like this.  But here we are, doing the best we can.  And we certainly couldn't do it without the help of all of you.  From the bottom of our hearts, thank you.

Karen's GoFundMe page